D I S C O : D I V A
Happy New Year...whether you're having a beachside picnic like me, snoozing early or partying till 2018, I hope 2018 is full of your inner disco lights like this gorgeous little jelly. 🌈✨💫
What a great CHANce for me to meet my fave MASTERCHEF @diana.chan.au at work on Friday! I was DIA(NA)ing to meet you since the day I found out that you worked at the same workplace. You are such an inspiration and I can't wait til @hwkrmelbourne opens up in Melbourne! #fangirlmoment#sorryiscaredyou
Thank you for all your kind comments. #imshattered. So to explain what went on -
I got a few flash backs and really overwhelmed. I thought I was going to loose a friend today. I don't think she understands how much I respect her and cherish her friendship. This triggered me loosing my kid and my ex running off with another guy.
Then it went on to trigger/ get flash backs of a guys face after he was decapitated after a car crash which lead me to my car crash trigger and smelling and tasting blood.
I just wanted to give up, crawl into a hole and not wake up.
Friend called me worried, she understands me like. I don't know how but she does. I froze when she kept calling and I scared her a little as I didn't answer - call to my brother who then calls me. This forces me to answer and talk as he knows whats happening and how to bring me down/ ground me again. I hate my life, I hate #pts#ptsd and how it controls me. I hate I know I'm not worth it and I hate I know I'm going to be alone for the rest of my life. Iv decided I'm getting a #ptsddog No matter what. #sorryiscaredyou #ptsd #myptsdrecoveryjourney#thisisptsd#ptsd999#ptsdsucksbuttheresalwayshope#imluckytohavefriendslikethis#thankyouall#nosleepformetonight#flashbacks#hurt#pain#blood#scared#justwantahug#cbt#emdr#groundingmyself#fedup