This is my mother in action. She had to diminish and denigrate me so much that I would feel powerless. And in that time she assigned qualities to me according to her needs. I was "good" when I followed her orders and when I spoke, walked, talked and looked the way she wanted me to.
I was "bad" and even "unforgivable" when I "strayed away" and began to live my life independently. I was "bad" when I asked for help or when I expressed dissatisfaction because she wasn't willing to act like a parent and be caring.
I was "bad", "scum of the earth", "the most shameful one" when I asked for her to explain why she invited physically threatening and abusive people, alcoholics in my childhood life (in our home). Why was it expected of me to respect adults by default, especially when they were emotionally, verbally and physically abusive? Her actions and decisions were supposed to be taken as unquestionable laws of reality. Anything that was questioned about her caused an immediate violent, rage fuelled reaction.
#cptsd#cptsdawareness#narcissist#narcissisticabuse#narcissisticpersonalitydisorder#narcissisticmother#narcissisticmothers#ptsd#pts#ptsdrecovery#emotionalabuse#abuse#childabuse #ptsdrecovery #ptsdsucks
The past couple of months I have lost all self respect and self worth. I let someone take that from me. I became depressed, afraid to communicate with loved ones, and honestly, at times, no longer wanted to be alive. I stayed in a toxic situation because I was terrified. I set an example that it is OK to let another person disrespect you and control what YOU are worth. I am done setting that example. It is NOT ok. It is NOT ok to be told you are worthless and selfish on a daily basis. It is NOT ok to be cheated on. I stayed because of fear. My loved ones were threatened, my dog was threatened, I was told I “would pay for it.” And during all of it my fucked up mind still loved him. NEVER let someone destroy you because you are afraid. WALK AWAY. Sometimes, your situation may seem hopeless. Sometimes, it doesn’t seem like there is a way out. There is a light at the end of the tunnel. When someone can disrespect you and uses threats to get his/her way... that is NOT love. That is narcissism. I don’t know what is going to happen next. All I know is that I would rather look over my shoulder than live every single day questioning my self worth. I am better than that. And if you are in any type of situation like this... you are too. Walk away. ✌🏻#knowyourworth #narcissist#selfworth#selfrespect#youarebeautiful#youarebadass#independentwoman#stoptheabuse#walkaway#toxicpeople#toxicrelationships#youarebetterthanthat#betruetoyourself#selflove#selfhelp#motivation#bestrong#lifeistooshort#imokay#girlswholift#bossgirls#fitchicks
- Link is in the bio, or copy and paste in your browser: https://wellnessoutpost.com/gary-rock-method/
The #GrayRock method of dealing with a #Narcissist will help you keep your sanity and safety. It will give you a chance to avoid #Drama caused by the narcissist in your life. Learn what to say when they try to #Hoover you back or create drama for you. This method is as solid as a gray rock and you should learn it.